Macs

You love macs. They are so aesthetic, hip and functional and when it locks up you have a neat, colorful circle to stare at in dismay. Plus when you cry because your life's work just went poof, the ergonomically designed tear drop catcher on the keyboard collects your tears and recycles them into a tasty mineral water, which Steve Jobs sustains himself on. Macs also costs three times as much as any other equivalent PC, so you know it has to be good.

You may be thinking, "This doesn't sound so great... why do I love them again?" Well that's because it's a damn site better than Microsoft's latest operating system "Poke in the Eye With a Sharp Stick '09" and its service pack "Rectal Cramp 2010."

Macs