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Main Entry: Cal·i·for·nia
Pronunciation: ˌka-lə-ˈfȯr-nyə
Function: geographical name.

1: state SW UnitedStates Sacramento

area 158,706 square miles (411,048square kilometers), population 33,871,648

2: The only state where "plastic" is an option for ethnicity.

Ah the the Land of Dreams! A perfect combination of warm weather, free thinking, beautiful people, creativity and remorseless, rampant consumerism and irrational body image expectations. It is truly the best place in the world to live the life you have always dreamed of, and promptly lose it to substance abuse, and other forms of self destruction.
I may sound jaded, but here is the thing, I am this jaded in KANSAS, imagine how much more jaded I can become after several years in California! But before that happens I can live out my dreams in the land where the streets are paved gold... and silicone.

The midwest is the spot where the lazy settlers who were heading to California got tired, or left behind by the athletic settlers who were tired of listening to the heavy breathing.


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